Marriage: 16 Rules We Live By

 Marriage: 16 Rules We Live By - Girl Nesting

Michael and I are approaching our 7th year in marriage…Where did the time go?! It just feels like yesterday that we said our vows in front of our loved ones. We have learned so much about ourselves and eachother over the years. That learning really never ends since we are always growing and changing. Time does this to people you know. These are the rules we have learned along the way that keep our marriage full of joy. This is our “secret” to still walking down the street laughing together, holding hands, and yes even flirting. This is a recipe in a way that will grow as we do, and we will never stop needing it in our lives. We are pleased to be able to share it with you.

  1. Communication. You are best friends right? Then communication is pretty important.
  2. Listen to each other, and most importantly show that you are listening. Think about that for a moment.
  3. Honesty is key. Don’t keep secrets from each other. Being open is letting each other in no matter good or bad.
  4. Set boundaries. Marriage is between two people, and not your whole family, friends and whoever else may try to cross that line. You know what you are both comfortable with, because you’ve talked about it…, set those boundaries early on in your marriage. 
  5. I just read today this next rule, and we have always agreed this is very important. Surround yourself with people who will strengthen your marriage and remove yourself from people who may tempt you to compromise your character and your relationship with your spouse. 
  6. Respect your relationship and don’t share what is private and between the two of you with outside relationships (family & friends). Unless that person is your therapist, they have no business knowing your private life. This breaks trust and code in a marriage.
  7. Be each others biggest fan. Encourage and not discourage. 
  8. Be there for each other. Be a sounding ear and comfort when in need.
  9. Be patient with each other. It’s not about just ourselves anymore.
  10. Don’t compare your marriage to others. What works for the both of you is all you need to focus on.
  11. Spend time together just the two of you whenever you can. With children this becomes a little tricky. Make time. Michael and I meet for lunch during the week. It’s really nice to still have that dating feeling in our lives. Of course baby Skye is with us, but sleeping. We also love our time after the kids go to bed. Also date nights are very important, call that babysitter and go out.
  12. Go on a vacation together. Leave the kiddos with family and go on a mini break/adventure. When you have kids that time you get to spend together is gold. It feels amazing to have freedom that lasts longer than a few hours. Of course be prepared you’ll talk about your kids often. 
  13. Remember to find the funny and laugh. We laugh at the funny times and we eventually even laugh at the not so funny times. It’s nice to be able to lighten up together.
  14. Put each other first. This one is really important. You said your vows, now live by them.
  15. Never speak about your spouse in bad lighting. It’s amazing how destructive this is to a marriage…Family are usually the first to break this rule with. Be careful. This breaks trust and the special bond you have between you and your spouse.
  16. Never give up. Always strive to do better, understand each other and forgive each other. You will have bumps in the road, work on it. Give the relationship the maintenance it needs. Take care of your marriage. It wasn’t easy to find, and now it’s up to you both to keep it alive.
  • Bobbi Whitney

    Hi Jahaila! This is really great advice. I’m not married, but this fits gf/bf relationships as well. I especially like #6 because I think women often feel the need to share too much with their friends or family. Thanks for this post. 🙂


    • Thanks for following 🙂 I completely agree with you Bobbi. I always ask myself, “Would he be ok with me sharing this?” or “Would I be ok if he shared this about me?”. Really helps!


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