Category Archives: Recess

Marriage: 16 Rules We Live By

 Marriage: 16 Rules We Live By - Girl Nesting

Michael and I are approaching our 7th year in marriage…Where did the time go?! It just feels like yesterday that we said our vows in front of our loved ones. We have learned so much about ourselves and eachother over the years. That learning really never ends since we are always growing and changing. Time does this to people you know. These are the rules we have learned along the way that keep our marriage full of joy. This is our “secret” to still walking down the street laughing together, holding hands, and yes even flirting. This is a recipe in a way that will grow as we do, and we will never stop needing it in our lives. We are pleased to be able to share it with you.

  1. Communication. You are best friends right? Then communication is pretty important.
  2. Listen to each other, and most importantly show that you are listening. Think about that for a moment.
  3. Honesty is key. Don’t keep secrets from each other. Being open is letting each other in no matter good or bad.
  4. Set boundaries. Marriage is between two people, and not your whole family, friends and whoever else may try to cross that line. You know what you are both comfortable with, because you’ve talked about it…, set those boundaries early on in your marriage. 
  5. I just read today this next rule, and we have always agreed this is very important. Surround yourself with people who will strengthen your marriage and remove yourself from people who may tempt you to compromise your character and your relationship with your spouse. 
  6. Respect your relationship and don’t share what is private and between the two of you with outside relationships (family & friends). Unless that person is your therapist, they have no business knowing your private life. This breaks trust and code in a marriage.
  7. Be each others biggest fan. Encourage and not discourage. 
  8. Be there for each other. Be a sounding ear and comfort when in need.
  9. Be patient with each other. It’s not about just ourselves anymore.
  10. Don’t compare your marriage to others. What works for the both of you is all you need to focus on.
  11. Spend time together just the two of you whenever you can. With children this becomes a little tricky. Make time. Michael and I meet for lunch during the week. It’s really nice to still have that dating feeling in our lives. Of course baby Skye is with us, but sleeping. We also love our time after the kids go to bed. Also date nights are very important, call that babysitter and go out.
  12. Go on a vacation together. Leave the kiddos with family and go on a mini break/adventure. When you have kids that time you get to spend together is gold. It feels amazing to have freedom that lasts longer than a few hours. Of course be prepared you’ll talk about your kids often. 
  13. Remember to find the funny and laugh. We laugh at the funny times and we eventually even laugh at the not so funny times. It’s nice to be able to lighten up together.
  14. Put each other first. This one is really important. You said your vows, now live by them.
  15. Never speak about your spouse in bad lighting. It’s amazing how destructive this is to a marriage…Family are usually the first to break this rule with. Be careful. This breaks trust and the special bond you have between you and your spouse.
  16. Never give up. Always strive to do better, understand each other and forgive each other. You will have bumps in the road, work on it. Give the relationship the maintenance it needs. Take care of your marriage. It wasn’t easy to find, and now it’s up to you both to keep it alive.

Random Thoughts at 3AM

3AM - Girl Nesting

Technically it’s Sunday already, but being that I feel I just went to bed let’s just call it up in the middle of the night. These are my random thoughts at 3AM. A time when all normal folk are sleeping snug in their beds and I just got done feeding a hungry little baby. A baby that just yesterday was ready to turn me in to the milk police, due to lack of. Thankfully I finally succumbed to oatmeal and this cow is back and running. It’s a good time to insert that I truly hate oatmeal. I’m not a fussy eater by no means, but oatmeal is on a separate island when it comes to food. Michael’s words, “it’s porridge, get ready”. Yuck! The good man submerged it in raw honey and blackberries, but I still got a good amount without all that and it was horrible! It was at that moment that I looked over to my 2 month old and then over to my 4-year-old who I nursed for 15 months – insert “guilt” emoji now. Formula is calling me, can you hear it? “Come to formula. We love you. We wont disappoint, you can relax now”. It’s taunting! They send it in the mail to taunt and tempt! I ate the damn oatmeal because I love my baby and I’ve convinced myself she’ll resent me if I don’t give her the boob. I did it for love. I did it to win a “mom award” because that’s a real thing – I just don’t know when it airs…Someday they’ll thank me. Ha, don’t hold my breath.

Did I mentioned I have appointed myself neighborhood watch? I’m up at 3AM, so I feel I will be good at this job. Breastfeeding mom in the window will surely scare the bad men. Look out.

Full Circle {Happy Valentines Day Michael}

Full Circle {Happy Valentines Day Michael} - Girl Nesting

In our old loft I used to wake up after a long night with newborn Zoë, ask for coffee in a low voice and Michael would miraculously hear me. “On its way”, he would say in the other room, I would hear the coffee brewing shortly after. These days I phone Mike for coffee because he’s one floor down. Living in a house with four floors, feels like living in a small apartment complex where Michael’s the maintenance and I’m the doorman. Each room has its identity and function, nothing like the open concept loft where rooms bled into rooms.

It’s a month now since Skye’s arrival. A month…How?! Time rarely slows down especially with two kids. I try to keep up with our pre-Skye routine as much as I can for Zoë, because that’s important for our little 4-year-old. Getting up in the morning to sit with her in the living room while she eats the breakfast Michael made her, that used to be my job. A new routine is born. The routine changes often with Skye still finding her rhythm of sleep.

“Should we turn on the fire this morning Zoë?”. “Yea, make a fire! We can make a fire every morning. We can do anything we want!”, she said with amusing confidence. Anything we want, who is not in love with that idea. I looked at my girl, who was once the baby in this blog…Her long curly hair slicked back into a ponytail that Daddy styled for her. That man is a super dad. My daughter looks more and more like me when I was a kid. Her golden brown hair like her dad glows in the light. She eats her breakfast every morning at the Eames Coffee Table Michael and I hauled home one evening back when we were dating almost 8 years ago. I had called him so excited that I found it at last online for a great price at a retro antique store in the loop. We rushed over to the shop in Mike’s small non-air-conditioned car that his parents lent him back in his college days. Somehow we succeeded in fitting the large piece in the back of the car and proudly drove back to my loft.

Michael lived two blocks away from me in those days. He would work from home in the mornings and then call to tell me he was coming over. When I wasn’t at a photoshoot modeling I was home with a lot of free time. Our laid back schedules were preparing us for our busy schedules today. I never thought then that this coffee table would one day be where our daughter would eat her meals. Isn’t life funny? Even furniture roles evolve and expand.

“Bye mom, I’m going to eat all of my food today”. Zoë yells to me from the stairs.

“You promise?” I ask her all-knowing.

“I promise” she answers firmly.

I laugh, “Ok, I hope so”.

“I will, I will do it.”

“Have a great day baby, be a good girl and listen!”, I say this on repeat every . single . day.

“I will mommy, today I will listen.”…I hear this on repeat every . single . day. Sometimes it happens. She is my husband’s child no doubt (lol).

I watch Michael from our living room window, carrying Zoë in his arms to our black three row SUV. He smiles up at me with that “this child will age me” smile we often give each other. I take a deep breath and sip my coffee. It’s that golden moment when I feel pretty darn lucky.

On Saturday, Zoë had dance class in the morning followed by a birthday party. When you have kids this is a typical schedule. Saturday mornings should start later, ours does not. We rise and shine to Zoë our personal alarm clock who insists it’s time to get up because the sun is up. So Michael and I stumble out of bed half awake and turn on that coffee machine once again. Fast track past adorable girls twirling with colorful scarves, past the fun birthday party and little adorable faces painted, to Michael and I pushing our babies in the stroller in front of that same retro store we found our Herman Miller Eames Coffee Table 8 years ago.

“Michael, it’s that store! Remember?!”

“No way!”

“It’s still here. We have to go in!”

We pushed our babies through memory lane, both a little older, a little wiser and now a family of our own. I watched Michael look around the antiques, silent in his thoughts. A nostalgic smile crept over his face. Time had gone by. Somehow fate had led us here again, full circle. We had found our way back to a place we never would have thought to return. A place filled with furniture from the 50’s, 60’s and so on. The very place, even though we didn’t know it at the time, we bought our first piece of furniture together. Now here we are, with our daughters years later. A little older, a little wiser and now a family of our own.

Sentimental items take life at any time, like our beloved coffee table. We’ve put our feet up, addressed our wedding invitations, birth announcements and birthday invitations, ate dinners, carefully wrapped and boxed our wedding china, carved pumpkins, wrapped Christmas gifts and even changed a baby on that old table. Who would have ever thought?

Facebook 2009 “He also didn’t hesitate or even stall when I said I found the Herman Miller coffee table at an amazing deal! When I asked, “where are we going?”, he replied “to go pick up our table”.:))) Man of my dreams people!!!!!”

Full Circle {Happy Valentines Day Michael} - Girl Nesting

Full Circle {Happy Valentines Day Michael} - Girl Nesting Full Circle {Happy Valentines Day Michael} - Girl Nesting Full Circle {Happy Valentines Day Michael} - Girl Nesting Full Circle {Happy Valentines Day Michael} - Girl Nesting Full Circle {Happy Valentines Day Michael} - Girl Nesting Full Circle {Happy Valentines Day Michael} - Girl Nesting Full Circle {Happy Valentines Day Michael} - Girl NestingFull Circle {Happy Valentines Day Michael} - Girl Nesting Full Circle {Happy Valentines Day Michael} - Girl Nesting Full Circle {Happy Valentines Day Michael} - Girl Nesting Full Circle {Happy Valentines Day Michael} - Girl Nesting Full Circle {Happy Valentines Day Michael} - Girl Nesting Full Circle {Happy Valentines Day Michael} - Girl NestingFull Circle {Happy Valentines Day Michael} - Girl Nesting

*This reflection is dedicated to my darling Michael. Happy Valentines Day my love. Thank you for the beautiful memories.

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